Arguing: For Dummies
Arguing, America’s newest favorite past time. One of the most efficient ways to get what you want. As well as one of the most efficient ways to get rid of those pesky friends and family members of yours. But in all seriousness, knowing how to argue is essential to living in today's world. Being able to argue responsibility gives you the ability to properly fight for yourself, fight for your family, and fight for those in your community. You want to have your voice heard, you want to be listened to and respected. As the late Ruth Baders Ginsburg once said, “Reacting in anger or annoyance will not advance one's ability to persuade.” If you want your city to fill in a pothole on your street, or you disagree with an HOA policy, or you’re simply having a conversation with your neighbor about the current political standings; Arguing can help you in all of these instances. As stated in “Arguing in communities” written by Gary Layne Hatch, by effectively understanding the issue, supporting your claims, and arguing with a purpose, you will be able to have safe, responsible, and overall effective arguments.
One claim that Hatch emphasizes is that not everyone will be willing to argue or negotiate. There are those who will be stubborn and unwilling to listen to any counter arguments. Those of which are some of the most difficult people to converse with, because they insist on benefiting themselves instead of working to compromise to benefit the many. With this, Hatch states that it must be understood that art of persuasion can be abused and used to manipulate, deceive or entrap. These methods of arguing are just as dangerous as the abuse of force, and should never be used as a way to communicate. Instead, it needs to be understood that differences will always be present within communities. It's the differences that make living in a community worthwhile. Difference in opinion, perspective, and lifestyle can not only benefit you, but also benefit the community in ways that could not be done if everyone were to think and act the same. Because if your views are never challenged, how can you be sure that they are actually valid, or correct? Answer is, you don’t.
Hatch then goes on to discuss how before starting an argument or discussion, it is important to ask yourself a few simple questions. “What is the issue? What claims to people make about the issue? What kind of claims are they?” amongst others. By answering these questions, you not only give yourself more solid ground for your argument, you are forcing yourself to not only hear the other side's case, but also understand it. You can’t argue effectively if you don’t understand what the other side is defending/fighting for. It might now even be against you and your views specifically, but simply a representation of a different point of view. Also understanding that not every argument is completely diverging from the other, nor exact opposites. Finding similarities in the differences is a key way to come to a conclusion that either benefits or satisfies each party.
In the end, these are the people who you live with and possibly interact with on a daily basis. You do not want to be enemies or opposing forces living so close to each other. Because not only will it depreciate your quality of life in that community, you’d also be letting one difference in one subject hinder your ability to unify in another subject. Something that I always like to say is that, along as no one is getting hurt, or being unfairly treated, it is okay to agree to disagree.
This was a really good piece and I loved your use of Ruth Baders Ginsberg quotes, they really helped/highlighted your ideas.
ReplyDeleteGianna ^
DeleteI really enjoyed your idea that most people aren't actually "willing to negotiate" when they argue, and they don't have any interest in hearing the other person's ideas.
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